Merula 4:3

Chapter 4:3- Odd occurences

Cold dead eyes were staring at me. It were Rogan's. This was a dream, I thought, it must be. Rogan can't be dead. I had to wake up, get away from these empty eyes. But then it weren't just eyes. His face appeared from a thick veil of darkness, his nose, his mouth, his cheeks and chin. His neck. It were all white as paper. Suddenly a red line appeared on his white neck. Involuntarily I reached out and touched it. I looked at my fingers, they were smudged with blood. I looked back at Rogan, the red line on his neck was an open cut gushing out the darkest red of blood. I looked into his eyes, searching for a sign of life but his eyes were dead cold.

I was looking into a pair of green eyes sparkling with life. Mandy, thank god.

-How're you doing? She asked with a wrinkle of concern between her well plucked eyebrows. She was leaning over me. -Having a nighmare?

-You know me too well, I answered her and sat up in my bed.

Mandy put a comforting arm around my back.

-Oh my, you're sweaty. Must have been one hell of a nightmare?

-It was, I sighed deeply and brushed back my black hair.

-Got something to do with what happened yesterday?

I opened my eyes wide. What did she know? Did she know it was me? How did she know?

-I heard you got home early because of a headache? Mandy inquired.

-Ah, yes, I answered relieved and with a tad of guilt. -Who...?

-Your boyfriend informed me.

-Rogan is not my boyfriend, I rolled my eyes by the usual nag.

-I meant Morgan, Mandy blinked her eyes a bit surprised.

-Oh.

I didn't have a better reply. Of course Mandy took advantage of my silence.

-So... you're not gonna loudly deny that Morgan is your boyfriend?

-Well... he isn't.

-Sure darling, now it's too late to deny the awkward silence, she teased me.

Mandy rose from my bed and slipped out of the bedroom. But I wasn't far behind but she had already been stopped on the other side of our bedroom door by none less than Rogan. I stayed behind the door, eavesdropping. Damn my curiosity!

-How's she? Rogan asked with a low voice, he seemed anxious.

-Why don't you ask her yourself? Mandy answered irritated. -She's awake now.

Were they talking about me?! Was Rogan asking about me?

-You coward, Mandy called after Rogan as he left the livingroom.

I decided to remain in the bedroom awhile longer to not make it obvious that I'd just eavesdropped their conversation before I walked into the kitchen to join the rest of the Evaeus family for their saturday morning breakfast. I loved their joint weekend breakfasts. They were like hotel buffees and filled with happiness and laughter. Rogan had learnt to tolerate my existence after awhile, a really long while. Tolerate is not the word, it was more like he put up with it as there was nothing he could do to change our situation. Unless he had money stuffed away to buy me a flat. I had the money but I didn't want to leave because no matter how harsh he treated me I rather fight every day then live alone, that's what I had learnt after moving in to the Evaeus home. It was the opposite to the environment I'd grown up in and I long thought I was a lone wolf, that I could take care of myself and easily live by my own without family and friends. Meeting the Evaeus and sharing their breakfasts and dinners had proved me wrong. I was quickly becoming dependent on their love and warmth. I'd reckon it was all due to Hazel's wonderful cooking. Who knew what spices she used to make the food magical.

After breakfast I borrowed Blake's bicycle to meet up with Morgan. He'd sent me a text to meet up in the library, which was unusual coming from him, even more so as it was before lunchtime which was when he usually woke up during weekends. When I at last had found my way to the library Morgan sat at its steps waiting patiently. His blond hair looked almost white in the sun.

-Took you long enough Ed, were his first words followed by the widest of grins. -How many times did you lose your way?

-Around three or five times.

-And exactly how many times have you been to the library since you moved here?

-More than my two hands fingers combined, I admitted.

-You really have no way of direction, Morgan sighed.

-Well thank god for maps on the phone, I smiled at him and parked Blake's bicycle.

-You used maps?

-Only when I got really lost, I said and sat down by the golden boy. -So what's up? Why meet at the library?

-Don't you remember? We, and by 'we' I mean you, decided that we should have a study session at the library. This weekend. For the upcoming test.

-Really?

I'd completely forgot.

-Then I need to get my books.

-You mean it will take you another 40 minutes to go home, get your stuff and get back before we can actually start.

I had to smile. It would take me approx 40 minutes when really should just take like 20.

-Maybe, I answered devious.

-Then I'm coming with you, saving both us some time.

And that's how we ended up getting back to the flat together. It was the first time I'd invited him in. Not that I really invited him but rather he invited himself. Anyhow, I let him in.

Despite the common breakfast when everyone gathered no one was home now. They had all flown out. Well, not everyone it apparently. Rogan walked out of his bedroom as we entered the flat. He took one look at me and then glared at Morgan intensely. He was not happy by the sight of the golden boy.

-We're just getting some books, I said carefully and slipped out of my shoes real quickly.

I practically run to my bedroom before Rogan could speak. The bedroom I had left this morning had been neat. It was neat no more and my books were all gone underneath the chaos Mandy had left behind her. As I was searching for my books on my knees Morgan positioned himself at the door frame, observing me and the room quietly.

-So this is your room, he said at last.

-That I share with two other girls, yes. I would like to point out that this mess was not created by me.

-Aha.

I could hear on Morgan's voice that he wasn't convinced. I rolled my eyes.

-Are you going to help or should I go through this mess alone for 40 minutes to find my books? I asked him.

-Edi, do you really think I should go through a mess created by girls?

I rolled my eyes again.

-Wait outside then, I said with a grumpy voice.

He disappeared and I rummaged through the room as quickly as I could. Damn Mandy! When I finally found my books I discovered Morgan at the kitchen table with a cup of tea in his hands.

-What are you doing? I asked him and glanced towards Blake and Rogan's bedroom.

-Making myself comfortable. Want one? Morgan raised his cup to me.

-We're supposed to go to the library.

-We might as well stay here, save ourselves some time. Morgan took a sip from the cup.

-No we can't, I hissed.

-What, are you afraid or something? He raised an eyebrow.

-Of course not!

No, I was not afraid. Why should I be? This was my home as much as Rogan's. Why shouldn't I be able to stay home and study?! I put my books on the kitchen table and went straight to the water boiler and filled it with more water. Then I prepared my own cup of tea. I reached for the tea in the cupboard but couldn't get it. Suddenly another hand reached for the tea and I was pushed against the kitchen counter. Morgan put his mouth close to my ear.

-You should use a chair when you get the tea, he teased me and brought down the tea for me.

-I'm not that short, I pouted.

I turned around and saw Rogan staring at us.

-What are you doing? He asked.

I didn't like his tone. I put on a stern face.

-Making tea. Want some?

Rogan furrowed his eyebrows,in irritation no doubt, and turned around and went back to his bedroom. I turned back to Morgan.

-So let's study.

-Oh, he whined.

To be continued...
By J.L.Frick

Merula 4:2

Chapter 4:2 -Odd occurrences

Morgan led me out of the classroom. My legs were shaking and my mind was fuzzy with thoughts. What has just happened? Was it just my imagination or had I...? Was it my fault that the lamp exploded? How did I do that? What if someone got hurt? But I had wanted for someone to get hurt. I had wanted to hurt Rogan. What if I killed him? I met Rogan's brown eyes among the students. He stared furiously at me as always. My knees gave in. I had almost killed him. For what? For a little attention from the teacher.

I could hear the other students discuss this strange occurrence. Were they afraid? Terrified, like me? Did they know, did they suspect me? I could feel their cold stares, their vicious grins and hear their mean laughter. They knew., didn't they? My heart beat faster and harder. I felt caged. I couldn't stand their stares. I had to get out of there.

-Edi, are you alright?

I could hardly distinguish Morgan's voice, my racing pulse filled my ears. I think I nodded weakly to his question. I tried to stand and Morgan helped me up.

-Out... I need..., I tried to convey to him.

-I'll help you, he answered and led me through the buzzing bunch of students.

I don't remember how but Morgan managed to take me to the nurse.

-She's in shock, a little rest and she'll be fine. Don't give her anything to eat or drink before she has recovered from the shock, alright? The nurse instructed Morgan after she'd examined me.

-Yes, ma'am, Morgan said and saluted.

I know he did it to make me smile but I couldn't smile.

-You know, you're pale as snow, Morgan told me.

-I think I need to go home.

-I'll follow you.

-No thanks. Don't use me as an excuse to get out of class.

-I'm not, Morgan tried to look innocent with his light blue eyes and held up his hands in surrender.

After half an hour in the flat I was thinking that staying in school would have been better than dealing with my crazy head. It ached terribly and made it impossible to think straight. I couldn't figure out what had happened or how it happened. Worst of all was the guilt. I had almost killed Rogan. I could have killed him. Every turn I took in my head I kept coming back to how I almost killed him. I could see him dead before me. His chocolate brown eyes were motionless and cold, his body stiff and strange-looking. Tears kept coming every time I saw him lifeless and tears aren't a good cure for a headache. My head grew heavier. I tried to sleep it off, I even took a pill despite my fear of pills but nothing would rid me from my headache. It was worse than ever before. I could hardly see straight.

That's when Rogan returned home. I was in the kitchen, forcing myself to swallow another pill as he first one hadn't worked. I heard the door close and I could hear from the motion that it was him. I hoped he would silently vanish into his room. Fate wanted otherwise. He walked straight into the kitchen.

-How can you skip school just because a light bulb broke? His voice had its usual edge in it.

-It exploded, I said weakly.

-Have you always been this lazy? If you was going to stay home you could've at least cleaned up after you.

No matter how guilt-ridden I had felt when I was alone with my aching head another part of me still hated Rogan sincerely. How could he just walk in and start complaining?

-Could you stop spreading your things around the flat? Rogan said irritated.

-What do you mean? I asked tiredly.

-It's such a mess! You know this isn't your home. You just live here.

It had been a long day to begin with. This was the shot in Sarajevo. I could feel my tears creeping up in the corners of my eyes. I turned around so he wouldn't see my tears and tried to find my stuff in the general mess of the flat. I couldn't see any of my things which made the situation even worse. I was wrongly accused. I swallowed and turned around with a sassy smile.

-Could you be so kind to point out where my stuff are exactly as I can't seem to recognise them. At all.

Rogan's eyes flashed and I could hear him grit his teeth before he searched the living room with his eyes.

-Those earphones...

-Your little brothers.

-That sweater...

-Mandy's.

-That book.

-Blake's, jeez Rogan, do you think I would ever read something about some football player? I sighed.

And Rogan grit this teeth once more.

-That scarf, he tried again.

-Adeline's. Can I leave now?

I needed a nap or at least a break from Rogan. My head was killing me.

-Ah, those notes are yours.

Rogan proudly held up some sheets with a victorious and vicious grin. I lost it. He was so desperately looking for things to bring me down and I couldn't take it anymore.

-Those are YOUR fucking notes, Rogan! Leave me alone!

I stormed into my room which wasn't my room and shut the door that wasn't mine either before my knees gave in for the second time this day. I was torn between guilt and hatred. But with each breath I took my anger grew. I didn't even want to let it go, I didn't want to settle down and relax. My body shivered in anger.

And so did the room. It quivered around me and the light bulbs flickered anxiously. The room filled with tension. It was as if my surroundings came alive nourished by my anger. I wanted to believe that it was my splitting headache that made me delusional but when the old heater's water begun to boil I could no longer hide from truth. It was me, I was making the room quiver and lights flicker and the heater boil with fury. Terrified I opened the door and rushed out. Right into Rogan's arms.

-What! He said irritated and glared down at me. But he didn't push me away.

-Something's wrong... with the room, I said weakly, I couldn't tell him that I thought it was my doing.

He pushed me behind his back and slowly approached the bedroom. He pushed it open with his foot and took a quick look inside.

-There's nothing, he said at last.

-Well, I knew you wouldn't..., I begun to defend.

-Oh, I believe you. I felt it too. The whole flat sort of vibrated in anger.

I stared at him with large eyes and Rogan raised an eyebrow.

-I don't have any other way to describe it, sorry if it doesn't suit you.

-No, no, it's just that's exactly how I felt too. I thought my headache was playing with me.

-You have headaches? Rogan asked astounded.

I glared at him, who's fault did he think it was?

-Yes, like any other human being.

-Sorry, I meant it more like “you have headaches as well”, I also have headaches. More than usually. Since you came.

-That's probably because you go around and irritate yourself on my existence and fight every second breath you take.

-Not true.

No? was what I wanted to ask but I kept it to myself and sighed. Deeply. My hands was shaking nervously and I knew that if I didn't find a chair soon enough my legs would crumble too. I walked slowly into the kitchen, the furthest room away from my bedroom except from the bathroom but I didn't want to sit in there and wait for my legs to stand on their own. Rogan followed me quietly, watching me as I with shaky hands pulled out a chair.

-You want something to eat? There's soup from yesterday, Rogan said gently.

It surprised the both of us.

-Yes thank you.

I hadn't eaten anything since breakfast and my stomach was growling. Rogan reheated the soup and sat it down in front of me together with a glass of water. Then he sat down opposite me.

-How's your head? He asked.

I blinked at him. Was he asking me how I was feeling? This was not like him. First he gave me food and now he asked me about my health. I couldn't hate him at the moment.

-It's better, it's just a small nibbling now. I suppose the second pill really helped.

-You took two pills? You don't even like pills.

-Well, that's how bad my headache was, making me resort to unimaginable resolutions. But my headache's almost gone now so it's worth it.

-How long have you have headaches?

-Since I met you. But it's only natural since we fight all the time.

There was no disagreeing with that. All we did was fight and most of the time the reasons for our quarrels were silly or non-existent. Maybe now was the time for peace.

-Do you think...? I started humbly to build a bridge between us.

-No.

Was he rejecting my stretched out hand for peace?

-I haven't even finished my sentence, how can you just say no? I questioned him. -Do you know what I was going to say?

-No, I won't make a truce with you.

How did he know? Could he read minds?

-What are your reasons? I said and tried to act resolute.

-Do I need a reason?

-Of course...

-You're a bother.

-Hah, how can..., I hardly knew what to say, I was so stunned.

-You wanted a reason, Rogan shrugged his shoulders and walked out of the kitchen.

To be continued...

By J.L.Frick

Merula 4:1

Chapter 4:1 -Odd occurrences

I was late for my piano lesson. I run around the last corner and immediately backed around it again. I don’t know how I succeeded to run into Rogan again. What was he doing outside the piano room this time of the day? The last few weeks had been nothing but endless fights and quarrels with Rogan. After a day in school my head ached terribly and not even after school could I avoid the cause of my headache. Nowadays not even a good night's sleep could rid me of this throbbing headache. I was tired. The two things that kept me going was Morgan's smile that never seemed to end and playing the piano. Last week miss Helen had given me a beautiful piece that I'd almost mastered after a lot of alone practice during breaks. Every time I played it I imagined three little girls dancing ballet around me and the black piano. They were smiling brightly and laughing while doing their pirouettes. For the moment playing the piano was the only thing that made me really happy.

I peeked around the corner. Nope, Rogan was still there and it didn’t look like he was going to move. Oh well I couldn’t hide forever and I was already late for my lesson. As boldly as I could I stepped out from my hiding place and with my head held high I ignored Rogan and walked into the piano room. I would have succeeded except… Rogan grabbed my wrist and with a firm grip that I knew would leave tiny bruises he kept me from entering the room.

-What are you doing here? He asked coldly.

-I have a lesson, miss Helen is expecting me.

-You play?

He sounded honestly surprised.

-Yeah, I answered and hoped that I sounded at least a tenth unaffected by his question as I wished I was. But in reality I was burning with curiosity and anger. Why did he bother to know if I played piano or not? What did it matter to him?

-Which days do you play?

-Why do you wonder? I glared at him.

His grip got firmer as a result.

-Tell me, he said through his teeth.

-Let me go first, I said, I wasn't going to let him win.

For a moment I didn't think he would release me but he did. Instead of holding me back he blocked the entrance of the room. He wouldn't let me escape that easy.

-I play Tuesdays and Thursdays, I said and tried to enter the room. I must have been stupid to really believe that he would let it go that easily.

-Mornings or afternoons? Rogan asked.

-What time is it now, Rogan? I crooked one eyebrow.

He ignored the sarcasm and kept asking questions.

-Are both lessons in the morning?

-Yes.

Where were he going with these questions?

-And those are the only times you play the piano?

What did he mean? What did he want to know?

I sighed.

-What are you doing Rogan? Figuring out a stalking scheme?

-You are so full of yourself. I want to know when you are here so I don't happen trip over you in surprise.

I wrinkled my forehead. What did he mean?

-I also play piano, he said unaffected.

-No way, I said less unaffected.

My eyes must have been wide as the sky with surprise.

-When do you play? I haven't seen you here at all.

That wasn't true, I had seen him repeatedly the last few days hanging around the piano room but he had never been inside.

-Afternoons, Fridays.

So what was he doing here all the other times?

-So there is no way we could run into each other then, I stated.

-But you only play during those times, Rogan asked again. -No other times?

I suppose I had to tell him if it was avoiding me he wanted to do. Ouch, that hurt.

-No.

This time it was Rogan's chocolate brown eyes that widened in surprise.

-No?

-No. I'm allowed to play here whenever the room is empty. Miss Helen even gave me a key if the room would be closed.

It must have been first time Rogan didn't have anything to respond.

-Jealous? I teased him.

Before he could defend himself miss Helen turned up in the hallway.

-Oh Edi, you're here now. I was just grabbing some coffee, she said and held up her cup. -Oh, Rogan, what are you doing here?

Miss Helen threw her blond hair dramatically over her shoulder.

-We're playing I Giorni by Einaudi Ludovico. Do you want to play together, you two?

-What?! I probably jumped in surprise but how could miss Helen even suggest it?

-Oh, I've heard the rumours of you two, always fighting whenever you get the chance. Everybody else thinks you two hate each other but I think it's the opposite.

-It's not the opposite! I protested . -I actually hate him!

-Oh, ok then, miss Helen shrugged her shoulders. -My fault. Should we start? See you on Friday, Rogan.

Miss Helen walked into the classroom leaving me and Rogan alone. He still didn't say anything. What was he thinking?

-Well, now you know. So just avoid me, will you, I said and closed the door with a flare of drama.

-How's your head? Morgan asked and knocked gently on my forehead as I sat down beside him.

It was the first lesson of the day, biology, and the teacher was late as always. Morgan had already prepared himself for a long nap. He had built a small hill of biology books which he'd covered with his jacket. Had this been front row the teacher would have sent him to the headmaster before he'd even laid down his head on his home made cushion. But as always we were seated in the far back and the biology teacher had bad eyesight so Morgan wouldn't get caught. I still couldn't understand what he was doing in this class. Hadn't the teachers noticed that he didn't really follow the speed the rest of the class was rushing off in.

-It hurts, thank you very much, I said sarcastic and then smiled at him.

-Oh, it'll pass.

-You think? I've had this one for at least a month now.

Morgan wrinkled his forehead and observed me.

-That long, huh? Maybe you should stop quarrelling with your boyfriend, Morgan teased me.

Morgan was very well aware of the situation between me and Rogan. He actually knew most of my secrets already. It was as if I had been waiting my whole life for a friend like this and then handed him the thick book that my imaginary diary was. The worst part is that I never thought twice before revealing every little detail of my life. I sort of naïvely trusted him not to pass on my secrets to anyone. So far he hadn't told a single soul.

-You know, I actually think he's stalking me just so he can fight with me.

-Based on what?

-I run into him this morning, a long time before the school starts, outside the piano room. For a first, what did he do there at that time? Secondly, he kept asking me questions about when I play and so on. And as an explanation he tells me he plays piano as well!

-You play piano?

-What? Haven't I told you that?

How many surprises did I have to take this morning?

-Maybe I wasn't listening, Morgan smiled playfully.

-You never do, I smiled back at him.

The teacher finally arrived and the lesson could begin. Biology was one of my favourite subjects, it was easy which made it fun. Unlike chemistry that I had to struggle to understand at all. The downside of the biology lessons was that the teacher had bad eyesight which practically made me invisible seated in the back as I was. So no matter how long I held up my hand the teacher couldn't see me. He did see Rogan, who was seated up in the front. Rogan was practically answering the questions before the teacher even asked them. It was silly, I know, but that was the sort of thing I got jealous of. Today especially since I'd been studying real hard for the upcoming test and I had prepared questions about this topic. I didn't want to wait until the lesson ended to be able to ask my questions just because Rogan was monopolizing the teacher. I stretched my arm a bit further, waving it discreetly from side to side, hoping that the teacher would notice the motion. But no.

Frustrated I tried to hold back, I didn't want to yell across the classroom. The fluorescent lamp hanging just above me begun to flicker. It always begun to flicker around this time, it was old and needed to be replaced. The teacher laughed, probably because of something Rogan said. I gritted my teeth. Then it happened. All of the lamps in the classroom begun to flicker. The students wake up from their half coma distracted by the flickering lights.

-Oh, these damn old lamps, the teacher cursed making the class laugh.

-I'll turn them off, Rogan said and walked to the switch.

But before he could turn them off on of the lamps exploded and the students screeched.

-Ah, we better end this lesson, the teacher said and the students rushed out of the classroom.

It was only me and Morgan left in the classroom.

-Are you alright? Morgan asked me.

He didn't seem disturbed by the flickering lights or that lamp just exploded out of nowhere.

-I'm fine, I said weakly, I couldn't grip the reality.

-Let's get out then, it'd be strange if we were the only ones left.

To be continued...

By J.L.Frick

Edith Sword

So once in awhile I sketch my characters. Hope you can read my handwriting, it's not many people who can. Sometimes even I can't read what I've written.
If you have any questions about the characters, the story or the grey society they live in just ask away.

Merula 3:3

Chapter 3:3- Headaches and stalkers

I was stuck. Somewhere dark. Suddenly a flickering light exposing the surrounding. A light bulb hung slightly ahead of me. It stopped flickering and spread a steady light in the darkness. There was someone else there. I could just hint the profile of a person standing in front of me. The person opened its eyes. They were dark brown. The person’s mouth was stiff. Then the lamp started to flicker again and I couldn’t see the person’s eyes. The light bulb turned black and then light again. The person’s eyes weren’t brown anymore. Now they were light blue, piercing through me. The person smiled. Then the light bulbs started to flicker again and after every flicker the person’s eyes changed colour. Brown. Blue. Brown. Blue. The lamp begun to swing from side to side like a pendulum clock while its flickering increased. I could hardly see the person in front of me but I knew the eyes stared at me. I could feel a cold breath on my neck and cold fingers moving up my back leaving icy kisses on my skin. Then warmth spread from my toes through my veins to my heart. It was like a fire growing with each breath. But strangely it didn’t warm my back. It was still ice cold. It was like I was torn between ice and fire. As if I couldn’t chose between them. Or maybe I was both. All of a sudden the light bulb ceased moving and begun to glow, lighter and brighter until it lit up everything. Then it exploded. Leaving me in complete darkness again, feeling nothing at all. Neither warm nor cold.

I woke up with a hideous headache. I sat up in my chirring camp bed and massaged my temples. Mandy, who’d got used to the new wake-up-time real quickly, was already up and stood in front of the mirror, trying to fix her usual film star-look. She met my eyes in the mirror.

-Are you ok? How’s your headache nowadays? Any better? She asked.
-It just got worse, I answered while continuing to massage my temples.
Actually after Saturday’s incident I’d forgot all about my headache. Or rather it had vanished so I didn’t have to think about it. But now it was back again.
-Oh. Why?
-Bad dream. A lot of flickering lights, I tried to smile at her.
Mandy returned the smile.
-Well I’ve switched the light bulb in the bathroom so no need to have anymore nightmares about that one at least. Breakfast?
Mandy fastened the last hairpin in her perfect red-brown wave of hair. Then she poke Adeline with her foot and rushed out of the room to avoid the burst of little volcano Adeline. I too escaped quickly from the bedroom before I got hit by a pillow or in worst case a fat book.
The kitchen was as usually buzzing with life despite the early morning. Everyone was up. Hazel and Owen, the twins, Blake. Yes, even Rogan was up, looking grumpy as usual.
-Morning ladies, Hazel welcomed us and smiled brightly as always. –Edi, are you alright? You look down.
-Just a headache, I mumbled and sat down at the table.
-Oh. You want a pill? Hazel smiled comfortingly at me with her head slightly tilted.
-No thank you.
Owen put down his morning paper briefly and looked at me through his ancient glasses.
-I heard you got into a new class.
-Yes, sir.
Mandy’s father felt like a person you should address as sir.
-Which one? He asked and rustled with his paper impatiently, longing to get back to his reading.
-5…
-Oh, that a year higher, isn’t it? Hazel asked.
-Wow, are you smart? One of the twins asked.
-Can you solve this problem for me then? The other twin asked and put his math homework in front of me.
-…A, I completed my sentence and the family immediately silenced, very much aware that it was Rogan’s class.
-Oh, Hazel said again, this time with a lot more effort into it.
Rogan wasn’t late to response to the striking silence, he had a flare for drama. He rose from his chair and walked out of the kitchen with decisive steps. At least he didn’t slam the door.
-That can’t be good, Blake said chewing on his sandwich.
-Blake, why would you say that? Hazel chided him.
-Well, Rogan obviously has a problem with Edith, whether we like it or not. If it isn’t solved it will only grow worse and if they’re in the same class it will probably escalate faster. By the way, I’m going to look at some flats today with some mates so I will be late.
Blake disappeared from kitchen before anyone could stop him.
-And there goes our only chance for a truce, Mandy said dramatic and the twins giggled while Hazel stared upset at her.
-What’s with my kids? Hazel sighed and turned away to the stove.

The bus ride to school was fun. Of course I’m not serious. The bus seemed to have major difficulties with its engine. At every red light it broke down and its engine made strange choking noises. Five stops away from school it stopped working completely and all of the passengers had to get off to wait for a replacement bus. Mandy and I decided to walk the rest of the way. Good thing we’d taken the early bus. School wasn’t that far away anyway so we’d be there on time.

We weren’t the only ones deciding to take a walk. Walking a few meters ahead of us was Rogan.
-Whoaho little brother! Mandy called after her brother. –Wait up Rogan!
-What are you doing? I silently asked Mandy. –Are you looking for troubles?
-Actually, I thought we could solve them on our way to school. Blake is right, this problem Rogan has with you will only escalate if it isn’t taken care of.
-So you will play peacemaker?
-Why not? Rogan! Can you hear me little brother?
Oh he could hear us. He glared back at the two of us and walked even faster to avoid us.
-So much for peacemaking, I rolled my eyes.
-Another day then.
-Another bus breaking down more likely.
-That is actually more likely, Mandy agreed with me and sighed.
First lesson of the day was math. I lay down my head on the desk waiting for the minutes to tick away so the class could begin. Suddenly a blond boy dropped down in the seat beside me. He smiled at me and reached out his hand. I took it hesitantly.
-Morgan.
-Edi. Eh, are you in the wrong classroom?
-Nope, this is the one.
-Are you sure?
-Yep, definitely. But are you in the right one?
-What? Yes, of course I am.
-You weren’t in this class last week.
-Well no. I switched this week.
-Ah then you’re the new one the school’s been whispering about.
-I suppose so.
He reached out his hand again. I took it again hesitantly.
-Morgan Kimmel, he said with a bright smile.
-Edith Sword.
I couldn’t help but smile back at him.
-So what did you do to end up in the back? Morgan asked.
-Do you have to do anything?
-Well, no one ever sits here voluntarily.
-I do.
-Great! So do I.
He had the widest smile I’d ever seen.
-Not that there is much of a choice. These were the only available seats left, I said to him.
-Ah, you’re right, he said and laughed.
I laughed too. Laughing is catching.
Suddenly a cold chill run down my spine and I saw Rogan staring furiously at Morgan, not at me for once. Morgan followed my gaze and looked at Rogan. His smile changed to a grin.
-Seems I’m treading dangerous ground. He’s your boyfriend?
-No! Definitely not.
Morgan met my eyes with his innocent blue.
-I was only asking.

-Well I was only answering, firmly, I said dryly and glared at Rogan.

-I guess you don’t like him that much.
-Correct.
-Same here, Morgan said.
I looked at him with surprise. Had I found the only other person in school besides me who didn’t like Rogan? Morgan smiled at me and I carefully smiled back at him. Now I didn’t hesitate.
-My enemy’s enemy is my friend, I said and offered my hand which he immediately grabbed.
We then stared back at Rogan together in our newly formed union against Rogan.
-So are you any good at math? Morgan asked me as mr Stone appeared right on time for class.
-As it happens, a genius actually, I answered.
-Great! I suck.
What did he do in mr Stone’s class then, I thought but never asked.
He really did suck at math. When I wasn’t taking notes I explained them in detail for Morgan.

To be continued...
By J.L.Frick

Merula 3:2

Chapter 3:2 -Headaches and stalkers

Finally a new week and a new class. Don’t ask me how I survived the weekend. After the hallway incident and the exploding light bulbs I did my best to avoid Rogan and it seemed like he did the same because I didn’t see him at all. The few times I did see him and our eyes met, because our eyes always meet no matter what, he was the first to turn his head away and walk in the opposite direction. The tension in the flat was gone, now it was mostly awkward and that wasn’t so hard to survive. So I survived just fine.
Mr Stone met me at the school’s gate. I should have known.
-Congratulation miss Sword, you are now one of my pupils. Let me tell you from the start that I do not allow any slugs in my class. Just so we’re clear.
He handed me my new schedule and walked away.
Even though I had arrived early I was almost late to my first class. I’ve said it before, my sense of direction is bad. But I found the classroom at last. Somewhat nervous I opened the door and stopped in the doorway. The students all looked at me with bored faces.
-What? One of the boys asked.
-Excuse me, but is this class 5A?
-Yeah. Who’re you?
-I’m…
I didn’t get to finish my sentence as I was interrupted by a cough coming from behind.
-You’re in the way, a familiar voice told.
I was paralysed, fate couldn’t be this cruel could it? Slowly I turned around, hoping the voice belonged to someone else. It didn’t. It was Rogan.
-What are you doing here? Are you stalking me? He asked with cold eyes.
-I…, I didn’t know what to respond.
I was obviously stalking him according to fate’s wishes.
-Move, will you.
He shoved me out of his way and I was left there with my mouth wide open. Then I was further pushed inside the classroom by mr Stone.
-Everyone, this is miss Edith Sword. She’s your new classmate. Be nice, mr Stone said with a bored voice as he introduced me. –Miss Sword, take an available seat so the class can begin.
Mr Stone pushed me in the direction of the only two available seats left in the classroom. Here comes the good news, they were far away from Rogan and they were in the back of the classroom, my favourite spot. So I happily, except for the tiny detail of sharing the same classroom with Rogan, let myself be shoved to the back. Of course I understood that the back seats were the least popular for those who are keen on studying and that it is often the troublemakers of a class that ends up here. This class didn’t seem to have any troublemakers. I guess mr Stone allow them in his elite class, But now he had me. It is not my fault that he judged me by my looks. That is his own stupid fault. He was going to regret it someday. Until then I was going to be invisible.

Already after the first lesson was I in trouble. A blond girl who’d stared furiously at me in class dragged me to the toilets and pushed me to the wall.
-Don’t think for a second that just because he talked to you that he cares about you, she said and waved her platinum paled hair.
Who was she talking about?
-He is mine, she emphasised every word.
Ah, now the piece fell into order. She was talking about Rogan.
-So you’re the stalker, I said to her.
-What stalker? She said surprised.
-Lindy right?
-Yeah.
-He’s all yours, I said and patted her shoulder as I left the toilets.
When she returned to the classroom she looked confused at me. I must have been the first not to want Rogan.

Lunch. Oh, lunch. I never thought I could feel this starved. The morning classes had been hell. Which was actually great as I’d never felt this challenged before. And I’m sure I would appreciate the challenge a lot more after lunch or maybe after a few days when I had sorted out the mess all this new knowledge had created in my head. On a empty stomach everything in my head was spinning and made no sense at all. Right now, standing in line in the canteen waiting for food to fill my craving stomach, the afternoon classes felt like Mount Everest towering over me ominous. When I reached the salad bar and was filling my plate with various greens my phone rang. I pulled it up from my front pocket and viewed the display. A number I didn’t recognise. I still answered.
-Hello? I asked and put the phone between the chin and shoulder.
-Edith Sword? A male voice asked.
-Yes.
-Meet me in the library.
He had a very familiar voice.
-I’m sorry but I’m in school and I don’t have time to meet a stranger who doesn’t even tell his name. Where did you get my number?
The caller hung up on me.
-Rude, I mumbled and continued to the warm foods.
My phone squeaked. I’d go a message from the same number.
“Meet me in the library. Rogan”
Ah, that’s why I recognised the voice. Why couldn’t he just have said so? I continued to fill my plate and was just about to find a free seat when my phone squeaked again.
“Now. Rogan”
I sighed. I really didn’t want to see him at all, especially not on an empty stomach. Couldn’t this wait? My stomach growled but that didn’t stop my curiosity from growing. What could be so important for him to skip lunch and meet up with me, his least favourite person on earth? I hesitated. That’s when the third message came.
“Right now. Rogan”
I looked around in the canteen and sighed. There were no available seats left, the cafeteria was filled to the brim. Oh well, I might as well feed my curiosity if I wasn’t going to eat anything else. I smuggled out some crisp bread and set off to the school library. On my way there I saved Rogan’s number under the name Impatient ass and nibbled on my piece of bread.
I found him in the furthest hid away corner there were in the library.
-What? I asked straight away.
-I advise you not to mention to anyone that you stay with my family.
I sniggered, was this it?
-What? Why not? Is there a special girl you don’t want to get the wrong idea of us living together?
Rogan furrowed his forehead.
-No…
I didn’t let him finish.
-Then are you embarrassed because the girl you kissed on impulse is now living with your family?
I had been waiting to get this question out of me for a long time. If you could call a week a long time.
-It’s not that.
-You are afraid of rumours. You vain person.
I left before he could stop me. Once again he had managed to piss me off. And for this I had missed lunch. The afternoon didn’t look promising.

-Soo, how was school today? Mandy popped up in the bathroom as I was brushing my teeth.
-Fine.
-I heard you got into a new class.
-Yes.
-Which one? She asked curious.
-Rogan’s, I muttered.
-Oh, her smile disappeared and was replaced with compassion. –I see. Will it be hard on you?
I looked her straight in the eye.
-Piece of pancake, I said dryly and Mandy smiled.
-He’ll probably test you.
-He already has.
The bathroom lamp flickered.
-You know, I think he likes to quarrel, Mandy continued.
-Tell me about it. What is it with this lamp? I said slightly irritated and glared at it as it kept flickering like a butterfly.
-It’s probably loose. Anyhow don’t let him get to you.
The lamp popped and died, leaving me and Mandy in complete darkness.
-Loose did you say? I’ll say it’s dead.
Mandy laughed.
-I’ll get another one.

To be continued...
By J.L.Frick

Merula 3:1

Chapter 3:1 -Headaches and stalkers

My headache didn’t go away from that day onwards. And I hate headaches. So why not a take a little pill and get it over with you might think? Here’s why. I hate pills, can’t swallow them no matter how hard I try. So I was stuck with this glorious headache and hoped it would ease off soon enough. It did some when I was alone so I sought the quiet halls of the library as often as I could escape my new classmates from 4C. They really thought I was Jesus.

The preparations for the tests went alright. I had already done most of them and today I would do another two. Then it was this business with Rogan. It only got worse but that was only to be expected after my not so much thought through attack on his private life. But each time I saw him I still felt a bit satisfied. Then my head ached even worse as to punish me for my lack of conscience. As I mentioned our relationship only got worse. It was at the point where he almost begun to snarl when he saw me. Which was almost convenient, he was like a rattlesnake warning me not to take one step further. That way I could avoid most of the time. That system worked at school. But not at home, in the small flat. Somehow that tiny flat had shrunk. I run into him around every corner and there aren’t that many corners but still we managed not to escape each other’s company for even a second. Unlucky us. Unlucky me.
This is how my headache didn’t fly out of the window as I hoped it would but instead grew worse for each day that passed. Now, I wasn’t the only one affected by our intense role play. The whole family were. We were all tip-toeing around Rogan as he was the bomb of the family.
This is how my week had looked like, in order to avoid Rogan. In the mornings I was the first person up. I took the earliest bus to school and went straight to the piano room. Miss Helen, who liked me an awful lot for being a new student, lent me her key to the room so I could practice on my own. When I didn’t attend class or have an unnecessary test I hid in the library. But even there I miraculously run into Rogan from time to time. Was he stalking me? We made our courtesy glares and took off in opposite directions. By the end of the week he must have understood that the library was my area as he stopped showing up there. Mandy must have told him I was studying for my several tests.
Back at home, whenever I could, I disappeared out in the park belonging to the block and took a lot of deep, deep breaths. I had been right about the swing hid by the overgrown bushes. It was the best. But I couldn’t stay outside forever. Dinners went alright, especially when Rogan didn’t show up for them. Evenings went even better as I stayed inside of my room. The bathroom was a complete warzone, obviously, as there was only one. How had this family survived with one bathroom this long? This is how we survived our first week as a new family. The weekend however…
Saturday morning. A long breakfast. I was exhausted after yesterday’s tests and ate my breakfast slowly. Too slowly for some. I guess Rogan was waiting for me to finish my breakfast before he could eat his. When the clock stroke eleven Rogan had had enough of waiting. He walked into the kitchen and sat down on the only available seat. The one next to me. It took him one minute to detonate. But you know how destructive an empty belly can be.
-Get her out of here! I don’t want to see her!
-Rogan, we can’t throw her out. She has nowhere to go, Hazel tried to meddle.
The rest of the family quickly dispersed from the kitchen.
-If you don’t do it then I will! Get up!
Rogan abruptly pulled my arm and I had to follow. His grip around my arm was tight.
-It hurts. Rogan, let go, I said, a tad irritated.
-No! You’re getting out of here, I don’t want you here.
Ok, so I was getting more than irritated now.
-Who says you can decide? I questioned him and tried to resist.
His grip only got rougher as he dragged me to the hall.
-You’re going!
This was ridicules and my arm hurt, so to act equally childish as him I sat down on my butt.
-What are you doing? He asked incredulous. –Get up!
-No!
-Are you stupid? Get up! He screamed at me.
-No, I’m not stupid. It would be stupid of me to let you push me away.
For a second Rogan didn’t know what to say but then his fury really got growing and he grabbed my other arm as well to pull me across the floor to the front door. Of course I resisted but without much force against Rogan who was really strong compared to skinny little me. Then I saw the front door towering over me and real fear kicked in.
I didn’t want to leave. I liked it here, even more than my real home. And now I didn’t have anywhere else to go. This was my home. On the other side of that door awaited cold loneliness. No family or friends to support me. I was afraid. I started kicking and screaming for all my worth.
-No, no, no, no! I don’t want to! I shrieked. –Let go of me! Let go!
It turned into a real battle and I wasn’t going to lose that easily. But suddenly the front door was open and inch by inch Rogan dragged me out of the flat. I started crying, embarrassing I know, but that was how scared I was.
-NO! I screamed for the last time and then everything turned black.
No, I didn’t pass out. The light bulbs exploded. And with that unexpected event my and Rogan’s fight ended. Because it wasn’t just the light bulb in the hallway but in the whole building, it got completely dark. Oh well not completely dark but dark enough to surprise us.
-What happened? I heard voices from the living room.
-Power cut?
-This time of the year?
I could hear Rogan’s heavy breathing beside me. I was afraid he would throw me down the stairs or something.
-What just happened? He asked with a low voice.
-Power breakdown? I suggested and shrugged my shoulders.
-No… ,Rogan said.
-What then? I asked.
-Something else.
-Like what?
-I don’t know, Rogan said and stood up.
Affected by the moment he reached out his hand to help me up. At first I stared at it as if it was a dog waiting to bite off my hand but I quickly decided to grab the opportunity and took his hand. There was a small jolt as our hands connected which made Rogan realise what he was doing.
-Sorry, he said and jerked back his hand swiftly while staring at me with his forehead all wrinkled.
Then he turned and walked down the stairs instead of back into the flat. Had he forget how he seconds ago had tried to throw me out? Or had he realised how silly he had acted and that was why he said sorry? I couldn’t get more confused.

To be continued...
By J.L.Frick

Merula 2:3

Chapter 2:3 -Rumours (yes I've changed the title which I'm fully entitled to)

Even though I prefer to be alone lunch break was kind of fun. My new class gathered around me like I was Jesus, they the twelve disciples and every word I said were Gods words sent from heaven with a text message.
-How did you solve no. 11? It was so difficult.
-No. 4 question a, were you supposed to use Pythagoras’ or what? I tried that but…
-You probably calculated wrongly.
-What was the answer to 12?
-Can you teach me?
-Can you forge the next test for me?
Then Mandy waved to me across the cafeteria and the questions changed topic. And I stopped taking part of the conversation. Not that I was ever a part of it as much as it circulated around me.
-How do you know Mandy?
-She’s like the coolest person in school.
-Do you know how she does her curls?
-She’s like an old fashioned film star, like Hollywood in the twenties.
-You mean thirties.
-Do you know Rogan too?
-Isn’t he sexy like hell?
-I know.
-I heard he’s single, if you don’t count his stalker Lindy.
The girls all laughed.
And then the questions turned into rumours.
-I’ve heard he’s on meds.
-What kind?
-Psychiatric, like he’s depressed.
-He does look depressed, he looks so sad.
-I heard he beat someone awhile ago.
I am not a fan of spreading made-up lies and tried to smuggle myself out before someone noticed me. Then a girl said:
-I’ve heard he tried to kill himself. You know, his left wrist, he has a scar there. That’s why he always covers it with bracelets.
Somehow this gossip seemed real. I looked at Rogan who was located in the back of the cafeteria. He did have bracelets and they covered his left wrist completely. If he once had tried to kill himself it wouldn’t be strange if he was on meds either. My curiosity grew. I had to ask Mandy.

After lunch I was called to the expedition. There the headmaster, a plump older man, and another teacher, with a face of stone, waited for me. I immediately hated them both and I’m not the kind of person who hates anyone, except Rogan. Now, don’t blame me for disliking a person based on the first impression. They didn’t like me either. I saw it in how they looked at me. Disbelief and great dislike. I was not the person they had expected. They had probably imagined a straight back, braided hair-kind of girl with glasses on the tip of the nose. Not a black haired, rebellious looking girl with piercings. I looked like the girl who was the root of all evil in the school. That was just my exterior, but the fact that they judged me for of it made me dislike them. Mildred sat behind her desk and followed our conversation with her small glass-covered eyes sparkling of curiosity.
-You are probably going to change class to another one that’ll suit you better, the headmaster started.
-Probably? I asked. I wasn’t all too surprised by the news except for that one word.
-Mr Twigs reported about your success on the math test and I’ve gone through your previous grades. But…
But what? I thought dryly and tried to not look too bitter.
-This week we will test you in every subject so that we know in what class we should put you in. We will keep a close watch on you and decide what to do at the end of the week. My advice to you, young lady, is to not try to out-do yourself as these tests will not in any way affect your grades. They will only give us an idea of what educational level you’re at. Mr Stone here will supervise you. Any questions?
Oh, I had plenty. Like, is his name really Stone? Not Graveyard, as in he’s so dead serious. A lame joke I know, humour wasn’t really my strong side. I still smiled on the inside when I shook my head.
I walked out of the office holding a paper of the dates for the upcoming tests.
Now, how to prepare for a test you can’t really prepare for. First things first, find the right location where you can sit for hours without being bothered. The library. Secondly, make sure you have something to nibble on when you get hungry because you’re not going to leave this place for anything except bathroom breaks. So, apples and a banana and a water bottle. Third, make sure you have the right equipment. Papers, pencils and a rubber. Fourth, … I give up! I don’t know. Somehow my afternoon trickled away like the tiny grains in an hourglass, while I stared at the wall in front of me. When the clock stroke six the librarians chased me out and I wandered to the bus stop. Guess who I met there. Surprise, surpsrise! Rogan.
Our eyes met and he turned away. I was too tired to get irritated.
The bus ride was long and tiresome. I could feel a headache building up and I massaged my temples gently. Walking to the Evaeus flat from the bus stop I slowly followed in Rogan’s trail hoping he wouldn’t mind too much but without him I wouldn’t find my new home. I still couldn’t grip what could have changed him so much from the boy on the metro. Those were the thoughts going through my head as I watched his stiff back. He was well aware of my presence but completely ignored me. It hurt me more than I thought it would do. Then I saw his bracelets on his left wrist and was reminded of the rumours I’d heard. Maybe that was why. Maybe he had been hurt before, incredible hurt and now he tried to protect himself from ever getting hurt again. Maybe rejecting me was a way for him to feel safe. Maybe.
I caught up with him and gave him my widest smile.
-Hi, I said still smiling.
Rogan wrinkled his eyebrows, clearly irritated but I ignored that and everything else he had done so far and still managed smile.
-So, how are you doing? I tried to make it sound as natural as I could, despite that his glaring brown eyes from this morning popped up in my head. I was still smiling but my cheeks begun to hurt.
Rogan kept ignoring me.
-Soo, I heard you’re on meds.
Yep, that gave an effect. Though, not the one I was looking for. Me and my big mouth.
-None of your fucking business! Rogan roared at me and stormed off.
Couldn’t really blame him. But somewhere inside of me I felt satisfied. Which wasn’t the feeling I had set out to feel. But Rogan’s neglect made me mad and I wanted revenge for… something.
Maybe, after all, he was just a jerk who couldn’t handle that the girl he’d kissed moved into his flat to live with him and his family. What a jerk.

To be continued...
By J.L.Frick

Merula 2:2

Chapter 2:2 -School

Mandy was right. The school was one big grey square, hovering like an ominous raincloud. Dull and ugly. And it was bigger than my little private school. Mandy thought there were about 3000 students going to her school, compared to mine with a total of 300 pupils. But the size didn’t scare me, on the contrary, it suited me perfectly. Here I could easily hide, be one of the thousands and I wouldn’t stick out. I could be left alone.
On the other side, I could also easily get lost among the many corridors. Or rather, I would get lost, the question was when. My sense of direction had never been that great. Grandma used to say I was lost like a needle in a haystack. She was right of course. I would get lost in my own neighbourhood. But I always thought that was because it didn’t feel like home. Like it wasn’t my home, my place in the world, that I didn’t fit in. The one place I could find without a map in my hand was grandma’s house. Of course when she passed away mum and dad sold the house and all the furniture. I only got to keep two things from her, her wedding ring and her wedding picture. And now I only had the ring left as mum and dad sold our house with all the stuff in it. I don’t know why I wasn’t more shocked. Maybe I hadn’t got it yet. I guess I had to wait and see.
When I finally found my way back from my deep thoughts I had already lost Mandy who had been touring me around school. It was as we were meant to lose each other. Where was I? Trapped in a long, blue never-ending corridor. The best thing I could do was to keep walking straight ahead. Maybe Mandy was just around the next corner. But no matter how many corners I rounded she wasn’t there. What did it matter, I got to do my own sightseeing of this grey school. As I’d suspected there were too many corridors but luckily they were all coloured differently. First floor was blue and was home for social studies; language, civics, economics and history. The second floor was green, it was the science floor. Third floor was yellow and housed the library and school cafeteria. Last floor, the fourth, was red and was home for the passionate aesthetics. I walked passed a room with wide windows. On one side of the room the wall was covered with huge mirrors and a bar. In the middle of the room stood a black beautiful piano. I hadn’t played since grandma’s piano was all of a sudden sold, along with the rest of her belongings. It had felt like the house and her things were sold the same day she died. As to bury her memory along with her body.
I could feel my fingers itch to sit down and stroke its keys, feel the cold ebony and let a melody flow through my fingers and fill the whole school with music. Unfortunately the door was locked.
-You’re new, aren’t you? A woman’s voice said right behind me as I was drooling over the piano with my nose pressed to the window.
-Yes, I answered and pulled my bangs to the side as I always do when I’m nervous.
The woman was long, curvy and had equally long and curly blonde hair. A teacher, I suppose, yearned by all male students.
-Do you play the piano? She smiled comfortably.
-I do.
-If you want to you can take classes here, on your free time of course. I’ll teach you.
-Alright, ok thanks.
Do I need to say that I felt really stupid? What was it with me and making a bad first impression?
-You’re welcome. Now, what time suit you best, before or after school?
Oh, this was going very quickly.
-Before, I answered, not really thinking it through.
At least I would get up in the mornings.
The teacher put her hands to the side, tilted her head and watched me closely.
-Now, you’re the kind of student I like. Do you know how many students I teach before school starts?
-Eh…
She held up a finger and tipped my nose.
-One, and that’s you. Since you’re the only one and I like you I’ll give you two lessons a week á thirty minutes. What do you say?
-Wonderful, I suppose, I said weakly.
-But you haven’t signed in yet, I take it?
I nodded.
-I’ll walk you there, it’s a bit hard to find.

It sure was hard to find the expedition, hid away in a deep corridor on the second floor, and as if it wasn’t enough knowing I probably had walked past it a couple of times, I was expected as well.
-Miss Edith Sword, the old woman behind the desk called me with a reprimand voice. –I thought it was you. You walked past a few times, but you didn’t see me even though I waved at you. You’re a straight forward girl aren’t you?
-Oh Mildred, don’t you dare read her horoscope, the blond woman complained.
-Miss Helen, I was simply asking the young miss a question, Mildred said innocent.
The school bell rung.
-Ehm, where is my classroom?
-Oh, yes. That is of course the most important thing here, Mildred said and swiftly looked through her many papers on the desk. –You really are straight forward.
-Her class, Mildred, the bell just rung.
-Fine, fine. Class 4C, maths first so it’s this floor, room 217. The 2 tells you which floor it is and…
-I’m already familiar with the number system. We had it at my old school too, I interrupted and took my schedule.
I thanked them both and walked away to find my class. Surprisingly enough it took me less than two minutes. I seated myself in the back of the classroom and stared out of the window until the teacher arrived.
-So, math test today. Hope you’ve studied, was the teacher’s first words.
For a second I panicked then the papers were handed to me and the test begun. I was done in half the set time. Which was when the teacher realised I was new. He stared puzzled at me before he scoured his papers.
-Miss Sword, am I right? He asked and walked to my desk. The students’ eyes tore away from the test to fix on me instead.
-I’m sorry, I should have read my papers more carefully.
I didn’t blame him, there was a huge pile of papers on his desk.
-As you haven’t studied for this test I’ll give you something else to do instead. If you give me…
I handed him my test and he run through it lazily.
-I see you’ve already answered some of the questions, he stated with a bored voice.
-I’ve answered them all, sir.
He looked up from the test to meet my eyes. Apparently he decided to believe me as he scrolled through the test once more, this time reading it carefully.
-Jeez, girl, you’re sure good at math, he said after correcting my test. –Which school did you attend before?
-St Avery’s, sir.
-A private school, I see. So those teachers does teach you something after all, not only eating up my salary, I see.

Merula 2:1

Chapter 2:1 -School

I’d set the clock. Being late on the first day in a new school was not an option. Not an option for me at least. The other girls weren’t too happy when the alarm set off in the early morning. Mandy sat straight up, shocked and annoyed by the sound of the alarm. Her hair was a real mess, tangled on one side and completely flat on the other side. Adeline hid under the bed cover and curled up into a ball. Me?
I’d been awake awhile before the clock turned mad. I was nervous about school and puzzled about Rogan’s reaction. For the rest of the weekend no one saw Rogan except Blake as they shared room. So I couldn’t explain the situation to him. Was it supposed to be like this every morning? Forever? Surely not. Maybe a week, at most. I mean, he had kissed me so he couldn’t hate me that much. But then again, what the hell was I doing in his home. I could understand him but if his weird behaviour was going to be prolonged… What a dramaqueen. Those were the thoughts swirling around in my tired and confused head. When the alarm started I’d been awake two hours already.
-Turn it off! Mandy complained and threw her pillow in my direction.
Somehow did the three of us walk into the kitchen together. Hazel looked at her daughters with wide eyes as they sat down at the table with grumpy and tired expressions.
-What are you doing up so early?
-Edi’s alarm woke us, Mandy muttered and buttered a loaf with half-closed eyes.
Adeline put her head on the table and went back to sleep. She really was as I had thought her to be. Short fiery hair, multicolour painted nails and a small body. She reminded me of me. Except I was black and she was a rainbow.
-Amazing. Thank you Edi. You have no idea how hard it is to get these girls up. I hope you set that clock tomorrow as well, Hazel winked to me.
-No! groaned Mandy.
I smiled happy, this was exactly how I’d imagined a family breakfast and it would be perfect if it wasn’t for…
Blake walked into the kitchen and swiftly made a sandwich.
-Rogan? Hazel asked worried.
-Says he’s gonna eat at school, Blake answered as he pushed the sandwich into his mouth.
-Oh, she simply said and turned back to the stove.
Owen put down his morning paper and fixed his eyes on his eldest son.
-He’s making his mother unhappy. Tell Rogan that he has to eat breakfast here tomorrow morning or he’ll be grounded.
-Owen, no, it’s alright. He just need time to adjust, Hazel protested.
-Fine. Next week, Owen said and went back to his paper.
Blake nodded encouragingly to his mother before he disappeared with the sandwich in his mouth. Mandy snorted as she tried to lick up the jam from her sandwich on her fingers. She was a lot perkier after a sugar boost.
-Like he’ll last a week, he doesn’t have ‘nugh money for eating out each day, she said. –Are you done? Mandy continued and pointed at my sandwich which I’d barely touched.
-If we go now, we’ll catch the early bus and don’t have to huff and scuff with the rest. And also, I can guide you through school before the mass arrives.
I stared blankly at my sandwich.
-You can eat it on the way, Mandy said and pulled me up.
Mandy and I took our things and walked off to the bus. I don’t know how she did it but somehow Mandy managed to look like an old school film star despite the early start of the day. Her hair lay completely flat and her makeup was flawless. Beside her I was invisible, or rather I would be if I wasn’t dressed completely in black.
The blocks of flats formed a square surrounding the common green. I saw a swing hidden by overgrown bushes, it looked rusty and instable. It could be the perfect hiding place for me when I needed to be alone which would probably be soon. I wasn’t used to being surrounded by so many people every second of the day. The walk to the bus took us less than three minutes and Mandy used the time to verbally illustrate how the school looked like a prison or a grey cloud on a sunny day. She didn’t really raise my expectation of my new school, but it didn’t matter as it could never compare to my old school. It had been a private school with squeaky old floors of wood, great teachers who enjoyed their work and lunch food from a well reputed restaurant. The building dated back to the 18 century and every classroom oozed with history. By Mandy’s description I expected this new school to by a lump of grey and boring concrete, with plastic floors easy to sweep but always in the strange colour mixture of puke and mud. The classrooms smelled, supposedly, of chemicals and crushed dreams.
When we finally reached the bus stop I let out a sigh and wondered why I’d bothered setting the alarm last night. As if my dark mood couldn’t get worse we happened upon Rogan, waiting by the bus stop. He’d plugged his ears with music and didn’t notice us until Mandy hit him over the head with a textbook. He pulled out the earphones and glared at Mandy (rightfully so as she had hit him) and then at me. What had I done? Was I supposed to prevent Mandy from hitting him by reading her mind or what?! And yes, I was overreacting, but this boy made me made like no one else. At least I kept it to myself, unlike others. I stared back at him but he avoided eye contact.
-What? Rogan snapped at Mandy.
-You forgot your book, she said and waved the book she’d just hit him with.
Rogan grabbed it, stuffed it into his bag and walked away.
-What are you doing? The bus is coming soon, Mandy called after her brother.
Rogan ignored her and put in the earphones again.
-He’s just a tad crazy, Mandy said and turned to me. –You’ll get used to it. Or not. Probably not.
The bus arrived and we took seats far back in the bus. At the next stop Rogan got on. When he saw us he choose a seat in the front. Far away from us. Or was it just me. Wasn’t this avoiding business going a bit too far?
-Crazy, Mandy muttered under her breath. –He must have run to get to the next stop. Why do that when he simply could have stayed put.
She rolled her eyes.

To be continued...
By J.L.Frick

Merula 1:3

Chapter 1:3 -Strangeness and charm

The next morning came too sudden. I was ripped out of my dreams by the sound of sizzling bacon and sausage, boiling water, the morning paper being turned page by page and voices discussing some trivial matter. It was nothing like home. For the first time since I got here I felt uneasy and the memories from yesterday popped up in my head right on cue. But I easily pushed them away and got up. Both Mandy and Adeline were up and I looked forward to see what the younger sister actually looked like. Somehow I pictured her with short spiky red hair. I checked my face and hair in a tiny mirror on Mandy’s bedside table. My short black hair stood out on all sides and my blue eyes looked extremely tired. Had this been home I wouldn’t have bothered and just walked out in the kitchen with my hair all crazy but this wasn’t home. I searched the room for a brush. Besides the mirror the little table was covered by tons of makeup, scattered all over, a brush full of red-brown hair and some vintage looking jewellery. From what I had seen yesterday after my and Mandy’s shop tour she was a vintage lover. Her own story, that she told me when we drank coffee, behind her nostalgia of the past was simple. When she was young and just started school the Evaeus family had been poor, a lot poorer than now, and they had bought most of their clothes second-hand. They used to visit different stores and at one there had been a mix of clothes from every decade. As a little girl Mandy thought the old beautiful dresses were a lot prettier than the clothes she wore. It had been her dream since then to wear a dress like that. From what I could see from her room she had succeeded in her dream. Her bed was covered in dresses in all kinds of colour and shapes. I imagined that when she went all out she would look like Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany’s.
I tip-toed outside the kitchen before I coughed up some courage to meet the whole family I was going to live with for a long time. They sounded like a happy family. I could hear them joke with each other. Maybe I would like it here.
I took a step forward, tried to make it look natural as if I came direct from the room instead of standing outside eavesdropping.
-Oh, morning Edith. Oh right, you wanted to be called Edi, wasn’t it so? Mandy’s mum, Hazel, smiled warmly and pulled out a chair for me beside Mandy and her dad, Owen. There were two twin brothers sitting opposite me and they watched me closely. They looked like I’d pictured Adeline, with spiky red hair. But Adeline wasn’t there. Neither was Blake or the third, or was it the fourth, brother.
-Who are you? One of the twins asked me.
-You look like a boy, the other twin said with innocent eyes.
Before I could respond Hazel answered instead of me.
-This is Edith and she’s going to stay with us for awhile. Be nice, boys. I’m sorry Edi, these are my baby boys, Chase and Alli.
Hazel filled my plate with scrambled eggs, sausage and bacon and fried tomatoes. This definitely wasn’t home. At home I ate yoghurt with muesli and fresh fruit.
-I hope you didn’t sleep all too bad in the camp bed? Hazel added with guilty green eyes. –We’ll get you another one as soon as we can afford.
-Oh, it’s alright, don’t worry about it.
Blake walked into the kitchen with a dazed look. Hazel immediately turned to her son.
-How is he? She asked with a low, tense voice filled with worry. –He came home late last night.
-Yeah, but he was happy then, almost chirpy, Blake shook his head in disbelief and sat down by the table.
-Oh, that’s good, Hazel said hopeful and filled her son’s plate to the brim with breakfast.
-Yeah, but this morning he’s a bit surly. Bad dream I suppose.
Hazel’s smile turned down a little in the corners, but she tried to keep it up.
So far, I understood that they talked about the fourth son. Or was it third? I started to count on my fingers.
-Oh, well, maybe he’ll cheer up with some breakfast, Hazel said transparent and turned to the stove.
-Doubt it, mum, Blake said. –Mornings are never good.
-Blake, your mum’s only trying to be positive, his dad chided him.
-She won’t have much for it, she’ll only be disappointed. I’m off now, before hell breaks through.
Blake disappeared into the hallway.
-Blake, you hardly ate anything! His mum called after him.
-I ate enough. I’ll be home late, gonna watch flats with friends, he called back and the front door closed behind him.
-What was all that about? I whispered to Mandy. Their conversation had made me curious, it was as if I had been watching some soap opera.
-Hm, Mandy answered distantly, too busy concentrating on her sandwich. –Oh, that. It’s about my little brother, he’s moody.
At that time Mandy’s little brother walked into the kitchen. But he wasn’t all that little. He must have been around my age. He had dark hair, resembling his father more than his mother. The corner of his mouth was turned down and he looked really grumpy. He looked, all in all, moody. He took Blake’s seat and Hazel placed a plate with food and a cup of tea in front of him. He reached for the honey which stood right in front of me. He must have noticed me because he lifted his head and our eyes met. I looked into a pair of dark brown eyes. Brown and warm like brownies.
-Oh, right, Rogan this is Edith, she’ll be staying with us while her parents are away.
Those brownie eyes narrowed and their warmth disappeared. He pulled back his hand as I’ve bitten him and quickly rose from the table. A few seconds later a door slammed and Hazel sat down in the chair Rogan just left. She looked exhausted.
-“Surly” is misjudging it completely. I don’t understand, why he’s reacting this way? Hazel sighed.
I knew the answer. Who would expect the girl you kissed yesterday to show up in your kitchen the following morning? Mornings really wasn’t his time of the day.
But still, was this the way to react? Couldn’t he just pretend like nothing- like I had to do! He could at least have said hi. We’d kissed, ok, so what? It wasn’t the end of the world and it was only the two of us who knew. I, for sure, would bring this secret to the grave. How embarrassing wouldn’t it be for me to say “oh, was that your son, we kissed yesterday”. It just a kiss! Did he have to slam the door as if he was upset over something big, like… being grounded, I know it’s not that big of a deal either but it was the best my shocked brain could think of. This was overreacting for sure. The more I thought about it the more upset I got. His behaviour was completely out of line. Rude even!
Another door slam, some brisk movement in the hallway and yet another door slam. This time the front door I concluded from the sound it. The whole family breathed out.
-Oh dear, don’t think we’ll see him for the rest of the day, Hazel sighed once more.
-Yeah, lucky us, Mandy cheered unenthusiastically with the sandwich in her hand and the twins giggled.
-Mandy, her dad rebuked her.
Mandy put on a fake innocent look with pouting lips. Owen went back to reading the papers with a snort.
-Are you done with your breakfast? Mandy asked me and I hardly got to answer before she dragged me away from the kitchen.

To be continued...
By J.L.Frick

Merula 1:2

Chapter 1:2- Strangeness and charm

Great. I’d lost Mandy. And she had my bag. With my wallet. She had my ticket as well.
The day had gone by in a blur and I had enjoyed every second. Mandy and I had scoured the city thoroughly in the chase of useless stuff that we in the end didn’t buy. We were two of a kind, Mandy was a penny-pincher and I had money enough to make me passive, there was nothing I wanted and there were nothing that suited Mandy and had the price she liked. Instead we treated ourselves some coffee and cookies and chit-chatted. Suddenly the sun had begun to set and Mandy checked the time, it was ten minutes until the last metro. We rushed over to the station and got our tickets. As we waited for the train to arrive Mandy thought of the great idea to buy some sweets for the journey home so I told her to use my money and in a few seconds Mandy vanished with my bag containing the money and my ticket with the words “I’ll be right back”. When she didn’t return after a couple of minutes my wreck of a brain begun to overwork, after all this day had been spinning too fast to begin with and my feet moved on their own. I walked around on the platform while trying to remember which train I was supposed to take. So I lost Mandy.
I turned around, stood on my toes to see better but I couldn’t find her anywhere on the platform. A train arrived. Was this the one we should take? I didn’t know. It screeched and stopped. The doors opened and people rushed out and people pushed to get in. By the door stood a boy, oh well, almost a man. His hair was dark as chocolate and his eyes were dark. Handsome, yes, but what shocked me was how familiar he felt. He lifted his head and our eyes met.
-You know what train to take? He asked with a low voice.
I must have looked lost.
-No but I’m going to…
The speakers drowned out my voice and told the passengers to get on board, the doors were closing. I was puzzled, what should I do? Mandy was nowhere to be seen and what if this was the right train? It was supposed to be the last one. The doors beeped warningly and suddenly someone tugged my arm and I was on board. I looked into a pair of warm brown eyes.
-This is the right train, the low voice informed.
I took a step back to focus. It was the guy with the brown hair who had pulled me on board.
-Are you sure? I asked nervously, scanning the platform after Mandy as the train begun to roll.
-Yes.
-Oh, alright, then, I answered and felt really naïve to believe in a stranger I’d just met. –Edith.
As if offering my name and hand would make us any less strangers. But he took it all the same.
-Rogan.
It was something in his eyes that draw me to him, not only the fact that he was attractive. His eyes were the same as grandma’s, brown and warm as the brownies she used to bake. My cheeks flushed, I was staring! But I wasn’t the only one. He was staring right back at me, examining my body with his brown eyes. When he realised I stared at him for staring at me his sunburnt cheeks reddened.
-I’m sorry, didn’t mean to gape, it’s just…you seem familiar, he excused himself with a sweet smile.
-Likewise, I said abruptly before I begun to drool. His smile was too sweet. I didn’t even like sweet stuff, preferred liquorice. –You have the same eyes as my grandma.
-Oh, Rogan raised an eyebrow.
Had I offended him?
-You two have eyes like brownies, I mean they’re brown like brownies, and warm. It’s just, she used to bake brownies, that’s why, not that she’s making them anymore. She’s dead.
It felt like I had spilled out my whole family history or something. This was just too embarrassing. I usually wasn’t a talker, I preferred silence and awaiting the right moment to utter something knowledgeable. I couldn’t stand people who let floods of meaningless and empty sentences flow over you until you drowned. And now I’d turned into one myself. The Victoria falls. Not one of my finest moments.
-I’m sorry for her death, Rogan said and put an end to my shame.
-Oh. Thank you.
Our eyes met briefly and then he looked the other way. At least he could do that. I was crammed into a corner. I either had to face his beautiful face or look right into his chest. He looked well trained though.
The train made several stops and at each more people got on than there were people getting off. It was crowded. And at that point the smart people controlling the train sent out the ticket collectors to check every passenger’s ticket. Fellow travellers moved restlessly and took up their tickets from various pockets, bags, handbags, front and back pockets on their jeans and wallets. There were a lot of sharp elbows. I rolled my eyes, sighed and begun to search my own pockets for my ticket only to remember that Mandy had mine. Wherever she was.
-Shit, I muttered under my breath.
-No ticket? Rogan asked with his eyebrows raised a little.
-No, it’s just that my friend has it. And my bag. And my wallet.
-Oh, bad luck, Rogan frowned his forehead with compassion. –It’ll be expensive for you.
-Could have guessed. Want to pay? It was after all you who pulled me on this train.
Rogan smiled, at least he could appreciate humour.
-I can help you, but I don’t think you’ll like it though.
-If it’s free I’ll do anything you tell me to.
He smiled again. He had to stop that or I would eat him. Unexpected he attacked first. He bent forward and kissed my lips, not really kissing just keeping his lips to mine. My eyes must have been wide as footballs. I looked straight into his brownie eyes.
-Act, he muttered across our pressed lips.
Oh, right, as if the ticket collector would be tricked be that. Two teenagers making out, yeah right. How did he even come up with this idea? But I did as I was told, it wasn’t much of a loss anyway and I had told him I would do anything he told me to do. So I reached up to put my arm around his neck, stood on my toes to even our height and I put some effort into the flat kiss. This wasn’t what he’d expected from me, I could feel his body stiffen and his eyes glanced nervously at mine but then he did his part of acting too. He wrapped his warm arms around my bony body and pulled me closer to him. In the corner of my eye I saw the collector approach and I closed my eyes, hoping for snow in hell. And it snowed.
But it took at least seven minutes before either I or Rogan noticed. We got a bit entangled in our acting. When I finally released him his brown eyes had a different glow and I guessed mine had as well.
-You would be a really good actor, I complimented him to make the situation less embarrassing.
He smiled, his cheeks flushing a bit. So much for making it less akward.
-Yeah, seems like we actually got away with it. But I’d say it was because of our excellent teamwork.
The rest of the trip we talked, no more kissing. I wouldn’t really recommend kissing a stranger, no matter how familiar he seems and has eyes of melting chocolate.
Rogan had a similar humour to mine and we laughed most of the time. Then his stop came and I waved him off.
Before the doors closed Mandy was standing before me with worry in her eyes.
-You got on the right train, she said amazed as she pulled me out of the carriage before the train begun to move again.
-Just lucky.
-Lucky me, Mandy said relieved. –Mum would have killed me if I’d lost you on the first day you’re here. It would be just like me. Sorry by the way.
-No damage done, Mandy, I smiled to her, after all it was me who’d lost her.
I was really tired after the long day. When we got back to block 71 and the Evaeus’ flat Mandy and I kicked off our shoes and dragged our feet to her bedroom which was now my bedroom as well. A squeaky camp bed had been put by the element underneath the window. Beside it stood a suitcase, the one dad had packed in a rush. I sighed and sat down on the bed. I didn’t want to think about it now. Once again I didn’t see much of the younger sister except for that red mess of hair and some toenails sticking out from underneath the cover. Had she stayed in bed all day? I had never slept in a camp bed before let alone a squeaky one but I was too tired to care. I flung off my clothes and replaced them with whatever t-shirt I could find and snuck into the bed. That night I dreamt of Rogan. How could I not?

To be continued...
By J.L.Frick